Sunday, February 05, 2006

Hoodwinked and Underworld

Yesterday we went to see the computer animated film Hoodwinked at the local cinema. Later that evening, we watched Underworld on DVD.

Hoodwinked

This was a G certificate film (G = General release; equivalent to U (Universal release)). It begins with Little Red Riding Hood visiting her Grandmother, who had been replace by the wolf and the woodsman leaping in at the crucial moment, maniacally wielding his axe. From then on, the police investigate the incident to uncover the diabolical plans of the "Goody Bandit" as each of the key players in the incident tell their version of events. Nobody is as they seem.

The animation is not as good as it could be, but the story is entertaining and the dialogue is funny. It'll help if you've seen XXX.

Underworld

There's nothing like a good werewolves/vampires yarn and this is nothing like a good werewolves/vampires yarn.

We didn't bother going to see it when it was at the cinema because we had it on good authority that it was rubbish. However, with the current drought of any halfway decent films, the Underworld sequel began to beckon, but we felt unable to see it until we'd seen the first film, so we got it from Netflix.

I think that this film may have looked better on paper, otherwise how could they have managed to get Kate Beckinsale and Bill Nighy? To be fair, the storyline was not too bad, in a grandiose Dune or Matrix way, but the execution -- well, let's just say that execution is the right word for it. It should have been a "straight to DVD".

The recipe for this film is as follows:

Take equal amounts of Ultraviolet and An American Werewolf in Paris. Season well with Blade, The Matrix and perhaps a little Van Helsing (also Beckinsale, by the way) to taste. Add an irritating blue wash that passes for "gothic" and some delusions of grandeur. Place in a big bag with a good sized helping of horse manure and shake well. The film is now ready to serve.

By all means, get this film out and watch it, but remember, you can never get back those wasted two hours of your life.

4 comments:

crystal said...

I missed the first Underworld movie because of the bad reviews. Then it was on tv a couple of weeks ago, so I watched part of it ... disappointing for just the reasons you mentioned.

I've yet to see a really good werewolf movie, but there are some fairly decent vampire movies from the past ... even a strange but interesting made-for-tv movie about Vlad the Impaler - link

Viola said...

An American Werewolf in London is an all-time classic. Dog Soldiers is good fun. If you like surreal stuff, you may like The Company of Wolves. Although I haven't seen it recently, I saw Legend of the Werewolf as a child and remember enjoying it.

As far as vampires go, you'd have to go a long way to beat Interview with the Vampire and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Jonny Goodacre said...

This is kind of vaguely related, but supposing I wanted to send someone a video from the UK to the US and I wanted to send it in a relatively secure manner - what is the best way? Is Royal Mail good enough or is it worth splashing out on UPS or FedEx or something?

Viola said...

Royal Mail provide three possibilities for overseas delivery of small packages. Ordinary Airmail is insured up to £30. For more security, there is International Signed For mail (still insured for £30, but must be signed for on arrival) or Airsure (includes electronic tracking). Another option would be courier services.

The videos are greatly appreciated, but don't spend too much on our behalf. Looking forward to my next fix of UK TV.